I really thought 2009 would go without a single episode of Biloi's hemoptysis (coughing of blood). My son's happiness of celebrating christmas with his grandparents(his father's parents with Aunt Marcia)and with his classmates and friends was again interrupted when he got hemoptysis last December 26 at around 6:00 pm. With my immunity of his illness, i was no longer panicking even if blood is running out of his nose. I was already firm with my decision of no longer admitting him in the hospital despite Dr. Solinap's advise. Precisely because we don't have money to pay the hospital bills. We have no more loan windows to open and our local hospitals, both private and government had no pedia-cardio consultant. Besides, I already knew my son's condition having been denied of an open heart surgery.
The only medication I could give him was hemostant 500mg 3 x a day, several kinds of blessed water, boiled water with makahiya plants and boiled bark of a red tree. But most of all, I believed God still hears our family's and friends prayers to extend my son's life.
His hemoptysis stopped last December 31, in time for the new year celebration. I thanked God and had only one wish for the new year..."that may God still extend my son's life even at the expense of deducting several years of my life just for him to live longer". But as I learned to believe, God has unique plans for everyone of us and I have no right to question Him.
Biloi has to extend his vacation until January 8, 2010. On the 11th day, he reported back to school and took his 3rd grading exams. However, last Jan. 20, while I was still on my way home from work, his sister sent message informing me that again, Biloi is coughing blood. I was somewhat worried because it seems that his condition is really worsening. But again, I have to trust God and His will.
Fortunately, his hemoptysis is just mild as compared to his previous episode.
Today, January 29 I left home with Biloi still sleeping. His father is off duty and could attend to him. Hopefully, he could already go to school on Monday, Feb. 1. I wish God will give him a great 13th birthday gift on February 15, 2010.
As a mother, I felt the pain of my son's illness...more on emotional pain because I know his condition and I don't know how long he could survive. But still I have to keep on pretending that I am strong to give him enough strength.
I wish to extend my gratitude to my family, for their prayers and moral support. To Dr. Euniel Solinap, the fellow, pedia-cardio who handled my son's case at the St. Luke's Medical Center, for always replying to my text messages whenever I need his medical advise and for his prayers and concern, to Dr. Willie and Liza Ong, to Dra. Wisco, to Ma'am Alim, for her never ending moral support and prayers for Biloi, to Unang, my ever-hardworking househelper who also serves as Biloi's caregiver, to his teachers, classmates and friends, for their kindness, concern and understanding and to all those friends and relatives who are continuously praying for him.
"Life can never be free of pain but God will always give you means to endure and survive. In the rush of events, you will see that He's holding your hand at every moment."
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